19 Reasons Why I Want A New Definition of Masculinity

Sooner rather than later.

1. Because I don’t bury my emotions and I’m sick of being told to “man up.”


2. Because I hate having to redirect conversations away from which women you've fucked, want to fuck, or wouldn't fuck you.

3. Because I'm sick of being told that if I support feminism (which is really just supporting equality) that I'm only looking for a new angle to get laid or trying to appear progressive.

4. Because the female lead on that TV show kicked that guy's ass while the men hid and you said "what a bunch of pussies."

5. Because I don’t want to be defined as the provider and ridiculed if I want to be the caregiver.

6. Because I'm not sexually aggressive and I'm tired of being told that I didn't "take charge" enough.

7. Because I'm sick of you asking me if I fucked her, rather than asking me if I had a nice time on my date.

8. Because I'm not just a dick, I'm a person. I'm allowed to say no too.

9. Because yes, I love sex, but it doesn't define who I am.

10. Because I'm sick of being called a liar when I tell you I don't watch porn.

11. Because you ask me how big her tits are rather than what I like about her personality or what she does for a living.

12. Because a counselor said "I have the mind of a woman" when I scored extremely high in feeling rather than thinking on a personality test. (Even if this wasn't incredibly sexist, why would it be a bad thing?)

13. Because I like to cook and clean and that’s OK.

4. Because I'm sick of having my motives questioned just for being nice.

15. Because I asked to wait and you asked if I was on my period.

16. Because you were shocked when I slept in your bed and didn't try to "put the moves on you."

17. Because you thanked me for asking you questions about yourself, rather than asking for "nudes" when we texted.

18. Because I chose to walk away rather than fight and was labeled a "bitch."

19. Because I am a man and it’s not up for debate.

This essay originally appeared on Medium and was republished here with the permission of the author. Follow him on Twitter. 

Cover image via Shutterstock.


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