A Woman Saved All Of Her Texts To Her Husband To Figure Out How Their Relationship Has Changed

The things couples discuss when dating vs. engaged changed for this data collector.

On their first dating anniversary, data scientist Alice Zhao received an extremely unique gift from her now-husband: text messages. 

He compiled all of their texts to each other since their first date, which according to Zhao, was the best gift she's ever recieved, adding that the two are both nerds.  

Six years later, she decided to give him a gift in a similar vein, but up the ante a bit. 

"I took a look at all of our text messages from our first year of dating and compared them with our text messages from the past year as an engaged couple and then newlyweds," she wrote on her blog, A Dash Of Data.

She then made her findings into comparative charts, which show how the couple's texts have changed from when they were just dating to husband and wife.


They texted "hey" and "love" in the beginning, now that they're married, "Ok" and "Home" are biggies.

"My early twenties self frequently started conversations with the term "hey," and more recently I seem to have decided to no longer greet my husband, but instead agree with most of the things he texts me," she wrote.

Some words stayed the same, but their contexts are different.

As shown in the first chart, "hey" and "home" occurred more in texts more frequently than "dinner," but the two greet each other significantly less now. They also use each other's names less often. 

When you're married, you text less at night.

Zhao found that when she compared times of the day she and her husband texted, they did so less at night as a married couple. Presumably because married couples spend time together after work while those dating think about each other during the night and while falling asleep. 

While the findings may seem obvious, they make an adorable way to show someone how a relationship has evolved. As for Zhao, she knows that while her conversations became more predictable, it wasn't because the relationship got boring. In fact, quite the opposite. 

"We no longer have to text 'I love you' from a distance in the middle of the night," she wrote. "I can now roll over, snuggle with my husband and whisper it into his ear."

Happy Anniversary guys!


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