Why Jenny Mollen Doesn't Feel 'Lucky' To Have A Hands-On Spouse

"If you can't be a hands on dad, I can't be a hands on spouse."

When it comes to parenting, more and more mothers and fathers are stepping outside their traditional gender roles to take a co-parenting approach. Still, society expects mothers to take on much of the responsibility, while fathers "bring home the bacon." For this reason, dads who simply do above the bare minimum of what's expected of them are often praised for being "great parents." 

Mom and author Jenny Mollen has had enough on this double standard, and in an Instagram post, she explained why she doesn't feel "lucky" her partner, Jason Biggs, is a hands-on dad. 


"People often ask me if I feel lucky that @biggsjason is such an involved dad and the answer is, no. I expect him to be a good father! That's why I had kids with him. Nobody would ever say to a man, "wow, you are so lucky your wife feeds and bathes your children" For women, it's expected to love and protect and show up for soccer practice. For men, an hour or two alone with the kids on a weekend somehow warrants a trophy. (Or at least a World's Greatest Dad mug) This double standard is antiquated and insulting. If your partner isn't hands on, he shouldn't have hands.#sorrynotsorry #jennyadvice #comeatme"

Mollen followed the post up with a photo of Biggs on an airplane demonstrating what kind of a 'hands-on' dad he is.

In less than 24 hours, the post had close to 3,000 comments and over 44,000 likes.

"Now when I hear people try to act like it's a big deal that their husbands watched their kids for an hour when they went to the grocery store I think, 'Yeah ... he is SUPPOSED to do that ... it shouldn't be praised like a big accomplishment," writes one commenter.

One Instagram user explained how she and her siblings benefited from their involved dad. "I was raised by the best hands-on dad and now my brother is an even better hands-on dad to his girls because of him." she said. "And I won't accept anything less in my partner. #dadsarentbabysitters"

Another mom highlighted how her husband is sometimes the target of stereotypical comments. She said, "Thank you for this. It's such a crazy double standard that is overlooked. My husband is currently staying at home with our 8-month-old and he gets, 'Giving mom some time off?' a lot when he is out. Nope, just raising our child like any other parent."

(H/T: Popsugar)


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