People Who Experienced Miscarriages Reveal Helpful Things To Say To Those Who Have Lost A Child

#Say "I'm Sorry."

Pregnancy loss — including miscarriages, ectopic pregnancies, and molar pregnancies — are difficult. Approximately 10 to 15 percent of pregnancies end in miscarriages, yet, those who experience them can sometimes feel that they are alone. When others who haven't experienced the pregnancy loss try to reach out to them, they can find it difficult to know what to say. People are sometimes concerned about coming across as insensitive or wonder whether they should offer help, and sometimes this uncertainty can prevent them from speaking out entirely.

To continue a dialogue about miscarriages, the Miscarriage Association has launched the Simply Say campaign. The initiative features people who have experienced pregnancy loss discussing the things that you should and shouldn't say to a person experiencing loss to create a greater understanding.


While every person and every situation is different, it's helpful to have some frame of reference to use in your own situation.

One woman explains on the Miscarriage Association website, "You don’t need to have experienced miscarriage or say some deeply insightful thing to be helpful, you just need to be honest and ask them to tell you what you can do to help."

One of the most common things to say according to people is "I'm sorry."

Miscarriage Association points out that people feel a connection to their baby in the earliest stages of pregnancy, so the loss is a bereavement. Therefore, many people appreciate hearing things such as "I'm very sorry that you have lost your baby" or "This must be really difficult for you."

Things that people generally prefer not to hear include things referencing fate or age, such as, "It wasn't meant to be," "At least you're still young," or even "At least you have one child."

If you're unsure of what to say, the men and women reveal it's OK to admit it.

The Miscarriage Association is also encouraging people to get involved with the #SimplySay campaign by taking a photo of themselves holding a sign with a comment tagged #say or #dontsay, and sharing it online.

Take a look at some of the responses below:

(H/T: Popsugar)


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