Kids And Adults Talk About Forgiveness And Show Life Gets More Complicated As We Get Older

“Giving forgiveness is not about the other person, it’s about yourself. It's about not letting the hurt get to you and finding peace."

In the latest installment of SoulPancake's 0-100 series, people of all ages talk about forgiveness. In the past, the series has asked kids, teens, and adults thoughtful questions about soulmates, difficult conversations, and self-love. Like the previous videos, this episode about forgiveness shows how much our perspectives change with age. For kids, forgiveness can mean getting over a schoolyard dispute but as we get older, conflicts get a bit more complicated. 

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Forgiveness isn't always easy, but it's necessary for moving on. Despite all of life's beautiful moments, sometimes our paths take a painful turn — heartbreak from someone you love, betrayal from someone you trusted, disappointment from someone you care about, or any kind of hurt that comes your way. In the video, people of all ages seem to have trouble making sense of how complex forgiveness is. 

"I haven't forgiving [my bully] because she has hurt my feelings many times," said a 10-year-old participant. "And I've forgiven her many times. So, this last time I'm just not gonna."

"It's hard for me," admitted a 69-year-old man. "I can get rid of the anger, but it's hard to get rid of the memories."

Processing a painful experience and finding the strength to forgive can be challenging. Even worse, we won't always get the apology we're looking for. While forgiveness is important, it's also important to honor your feelings. Assess how the hurtful situation has affected you. Think about the ways you can practice self-love in spite of the pain. Healing doesn't just end with self-care though. You also need to let go of all of the pain through forgiveness. 

"If you don't forgive people who've wronged you or hurt you, you're allowing them to do that," said a 54-year-old woman in the video. "If you let go of that, it's healing."

"Giving forgiveness is not about the other person, it's about yourself," said a 23-year-old woman. "It's about not letting the hurt get to you and finding peace."

Sometimes it can seem like forgiveness means letting someone "get away" with what they did to you, but that's not the healthiest way to look at it. Forgiveness can mean making peace with the past and moving towards a new and positive direction. There is so much good that can come from forgiveness. Whether it's strengthening a bond with a loved one, learning patience, or just freeing yourself from a negativity, making the decision to forgive is a powerful one.

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