The Positive Response To This Dad Blogger's Facebook Post Shows Just How Much Marriage Has Evolved In One Generation

"I didn't get into this marriage for a clean house. I got into it because she seemed like someone I could spend my life with."

On August 21, Clint Edwards, a father of three and creator of "No Idea What I'm Doing: A Daddy Blog" shared a phone conversation with his mother that had been troubling him for a few weeks. According to his Facebook post, it began when his mom asked, "Doesn't it bother you that Mel [Edwards' wife] won't keep a cleaner house?" He didn't know how to respond. 


"My mother didn't say it in an antagonist way or anything. It was more out of curiosity," he continued in the post. "She'd obviously noticed that our home wasn't all that tidy. Not that it was only Mel's job to clean it. I see our marriage as a partnership, so cleaning is as much my responsibility as it is hers." 

Because the Edwards are both working parents, he was quick to acknowledge that the house was often filled with "kid clutter" and wasn't "as clean as [his] mother's home." But even so, having a perfectly pristine house did not, in fact, bother him. "In fact," Edwards said. "I don't really think about that at all." 

Still without an answer, Edwards eventually realized that his mother's question about his family's house — and whose "job" it was to take care of it — reflected the the era she grew up in as a Baby Boomer. 

"... I think my mother's concern over a clean house has a lot to do with her trying to meet the expectations of her youth," he explained. "But the thing is, unlike my father, I didn't really think about a clean house when I married my wife. I thought about how I liked what she had to say. I thought about how she made me feel. I thought about how she smiled a lot. I liked that. I thought about how she was sweet and thoughtful, and how she seemed like the kind of mother I'd want for my children." 

Finally, Edwards had an answer for his mom: "I didn't get into this marriage for a clean house. I got into it because she seemed like someone I could spend my life with."

The phone line went silent. Eventually, Edwards mom replied, "Well ... that probably is more important than a clean house." He wholeheartedly agreed — as did the hundreds of Facebook users who commented on the post. 

While Edwards response was commendable, what it really showed was how far couples have progressed beyond archaic gender roles. Many of his Facebook followers — who found his mom's question problematic — also helped show how far we've come as more than 200 commented on Edwards' post to praise his response and weigh in on the subject matter. 

One Facebook user wrote, "I'd betcha a dollar your home on any given day is cleaner than hers was when she had children. And I know that because you were doing dishes while on the phone. Your dad ever do that???" 

Another commenter added, "... kudos to you for making it clear you signed up for equal partnership."

"THANK YOU," a third commenter, Marie Elizabeth Belville, chimed in. "Sorry but things are way different than our parents generation. I have so much guilt/want to be a stay-at-home mom. But in reality, we could not afford that — things cost much more nowadays. I wish I kept a cleaner house for my husband. We both work full-time and do our damn best for each other and that's what matters most."

While one Facebook post won't undo years of sexist gender roles — which many couples still feel obligated by society to adhere to — it is an important testament to what progress has been made. Perhaps more importantly, the positive response Edwards' post received from many couples proves that modern relationships are more and more resembling a truly equal partnership. 

We've still got much work to do, but this is definitely a step in the right direction. 


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